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Feelings list for Emotional Intelligence

Feelings list for Emotional Intelligence

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A free feelings list (PDF) that can help recognize and name different emotions. This tool helps identify the root causes of emotions, how to manage them, and effectively communicate feelings.

For: coaching, social work, training, therapy

The Feelings List for Emotional Intelligence

One of the challenges in working with feelings and developing emotional intelligence is learning the “feelings vocabulary.”

With the help of a variety of words for feelings, you can describe emotions more specifically. This list helps to lay a foundation for a differentiated awareness of your “emotional world.”

Person talking about feelings

What are feelings in Nonviolent Communication?

In Nonviolent Communication (NVC), identifying feelings can help you understand and express your needs. Here’s an example:

Alex: "Jordan, I noticed the last three deadlines were missed. When this happens, I feel frustrated and stressed because I need reliability and support to keep our project on track. Could we discuss how to manage our deadlines better?"

Jordan: "I understand and see how that affected the project. I've been feeling overwhelmed and anxious due to balancing multiple tasks. I need help managing my workload and clearer communication about priorities. Can we talk about redistributing tasks or setting more manageable deadlines?"

Naming feelings is a huge part in NVC because it facilitates understanding, empathy, and effective communication. You can learn more about feelings and needs in nonviolent communication when you download our eBook for Nonviolent Communication.

What kind of feelings are there?

There are different kinds of feelings and they are categorized into 3 parts

happy face icon

Pleasant Feelings

calm, grateful, passionate, surprised, confident, delighted, excited....

sad face icon

Unpleasant Feelings

alone, insecure, terrified, guilty, disgusted, empty, upset, stressed...

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Pseudo-feelings

stupid, neglected, used, mislead, tricked, abused, cheated, forced...

“Pseudo-feelings” refers to words often used as “feelings”, but are not “real feelings”.
These pseudo-feelings are mostly evaluations, judgments, or blaming others for your feelings.

You can get the full list of feelings when you download the PDF.

Download the Feelings List

How are needs and feelings connected?

Feelings and needs are connected as feelings arise from met or unmet needs.

When needs are met, we usually experience pleasant feelings such as happiness, satisfaction, and peace. On the other hand, when needs are not met we tend to experience unpleasant feelings such as sadness, anger, and frustration.

By understanding the connection of feelings and needs, we can understand how certain emotions are driven by needs and how you can effectively meet them.

A simple step on how to use the feelings list

Identify Feelings

Provide the client with a feelings list and ask them to identify which feelings resonate with them.

Explore and Understand

Discuss the identified feelings to understand their causes and any unmet needs.

Address the Feelings

Create a plan addressing the unmet needs and strategies to manage the identified feelings.

Tools for working with emotions, feelings and EI

See more tools

More resources for you

  1.  Rosenberg, M. (2016). Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life. Available at Amazon
  2. Unlocking Emotional Clarity: The Impact of Emotional Granularity in Coaching and Psychology
  3. Tame Your Emotions with the Emotions Compass for Non-Violent Communication